When we are young, life seems to stretch out in front of us, seemingly forever. Concepts like wrinkles, aches and pains, chemotherapy, hip replacements and the like are almost unfathomable.
Yet, time does not stay in a bottle. Unless we are one of those who perishes young, that which we cannot imagine in youth eventually visits.
When I was much younger myself, my perception of death and loss was so unlike what it is today. I would look at older friends who lost parents, at "advanced" ages like 70, 75 or even 80... and I would think, "Well; we do not live forever. Death at an old age is expected." The older I become myself, however, and the more mortality for those I most love - and myself - marches closer to reality, the more my sentiments change. I realize that there is no "good" time to lose those for whom you most care. When a parent dies, it matters not whether they were 68, 80 or 100. It's a loss.
This past week, one of my close bridge friends lost his dad. His father also happened to be a good friend of mine, too. The "political-bridge" lunch bunch met for some 15+ years, arguing, shouting and railing about politicians and policies, bridge hands and bidding. A lot of emotion and a lot of disagreement - but, underneath it all we were all friends. Tough to see the group diminished so.
Another dear friend of mine sits at her mom's bedside, waiting. Her mother is an astounding 103+ years old .... Though my friend and I knew she would never last forever (despite it seeming at times that she would!), the letting go is still so hard. My friend is someone full of courage, spirit and fight - and all the exceptional qualities of my friend clearly were inherited from her mom. My love is with both of them as they face these final days together.
I am lucky. My parents still reside in their sunny Florida home, enjoying delicatessen, theatre and friends. Although serious health issues do now face them, our family looks forward to celebrating their 60th anniversary (!!) soon.
They no longer look like the lovebirds they did the day of their wedding. And, to hear some of their battles, you'd wonder if they would make it to sixty years without a knock-down, drag out fight! Everyone's love is individual, though, and with all its flaws, theirs still works.
None of us can keep time in a bottle forever. While you have it though - be sure to appreciate it. When it is gone, no power on earth can return it to that flask.
Addendum: My friend's wait is over. Her mom died about two hours ago.
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